Diagnosis: Crazier than a Shit-House Rat

So, for four or five months, I was on this amazing high (natural, of course! Hey, this isn't the 90's, you know). Then I crashed and spiraled into the worst depression of my life. And I've had some doozies, depression-wise.

Go to the doc, say "Hey, bud, let's up the mgs on my anti-depressants, I'm effing miserable here." Then he starts asking about my "moods."

"Moods?" I scoff. "Oh, you mean the relentless highs and lows that are my daily life?"

"Hmm," he mutters noncommitally. "Do you have any family history of [enter random psychosis here]?"

I laugh uproariously. "Are you kidding? I was raised crazy!" I look down at the floor thoughtfully and then glance back up at the good doc. "Well, my brother was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 when he was a kid. I looked it up some years ago, but I don't go out and buy random houses and cars, so I didn't think it was an acurate fit."

The good doc laughs. "There are several levels of Bipolar Disorder. I'm wondering, with your mood swings, if you might have Bipolar 2....."

The long of the short of it is that I made an appointment with a psychological network (which is quite frighteningly like its own little city) where I now see a psychologist weekly and a psychitrist bi-monthly. Oh, and not only do I definitely have Bipolar 2 (the milder version), I also have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. And I thought I was the normal one in my family. HA HA!

I'm on a crapload of drugs that make me ridiculously tired, regardless of when I take them (at night). I have to drink 2-3 Rockstars a day which helps some. Depression has lessened, but I still am having high days and low days and days when I think the white coats should just take me away.

I don't think my DH knows what to do with me. He, of course, was not raised crazy. Although (HELLO!) he's lived with me for 10 years, so he has to have some idea.

The OCD makes some sense (those of you who are familiar with my psychotic episodes regarding ants will agree, I'm sure).

Guess I just have to be open and wait and see what the Universe has in store for me.

Good times.

At least, for now, today is a GOOD day.

The day is still young, however. :)